From Worry to Wonder: Finding Peace in the Midst of Life’s Uncertainties
It is true we are at a point when we cannot help but worry. We have reached the limit of what human strength alone can do. People must know what kind of being the owner of the universe, God, our creator, is. Only through [knowing] that can all problems be solved… God, the Creator, is our Heavenly Parent and has gone through the bitter, tear- filled and painful six thousand years of searching for his longed-for children.” - Hak Ja Han, 2018
Good ol’ worry and anxiety! Ever a relevant topic for our day and age, but rarely something people ever really want to talk about openly. Just thinking about the topic makes me start to feel nervous and jittery!
Now that I’ve passed the threshold into life as a wife and mom in her forties, I feel like I’m beginning to come to a place where I’m a little sick and tired of letting fear and worry overtake my life, dictating how I feel and therefore, respond, in a given circumstance or situation (often the same ones) from day to day. As women, growing and maturing means we often take on more responsibilities, whether it’s becoming a wife, mother, leader, or other roles that involve the care, support, nurturing, leading, mentoring, and serving of others. With greater responsibilities, often comes more worry, anxiety, and fear. We might have thoughts like, “What if I die? How will the people I love be cared for?” or “If something were to happen to [insert loved one/ organization/ worthy cause you are fighting for], what would I do? How could I cope?” or maybe, “What if I can’t follow through or show up the way I was hoping or planning to? How will I live with myself? Will others be negatively impacted by it?” And we can go on and on. Sometimes we are haunted by our past, and we find ourselves trapped in negativity, feelings of hopelessness and despair.
It’s important to acknowledge that our thoughts and feelings are often not unique to us. As women, we are hard-wired to intuit, nuance, and ruminate (often negatively) on our circumstances and our pasts. There are reasons that, as women, we tend to be more prone to worry and anxiety, as much of it relates to how we are biologically engineered for the care of others. Nevertheless, just because it is understandable and common, doesn’t mean it’s an effective way to spend our time! Energetically, succumbing to worry, fear, and anxiety restricts us, it keeps us small and wound up, blocking us from really moving forward and extending our inner light into the dark world around us. While I am the first to admit that I am no expert, I want to offer some practices that I have found helpful in shifting out of a negative, worrisome and fearful space and into a more expansive and loving one.
1. Gratitude
I know we've all heard it before, but nothing expels fear faster for me than listing all the things I am grateful for. When my mind is beginning to race, as I worry about my children or my work or our family situation (usually while I’m in my bed trying to sleep), shifting my mindset to appreciating all that I have and have been given, and all the ways my loved ones have been blessed, puts me into a place of humility and awe. When I think about what I am grateful for, it helps me to tap into the wonder of God’s hand in my life. It puts me in a humble place where I become small, and my problems become even smaller, and I recognize that there is so much more to this life than what I am worrying about at this moment. Gratitude opens a doorway to hope, patience, and possibility.
2. Move Your Body
When I am too much in my mind, moving my body helps to redirect my focus into the present moment at hand. Sometimes this means literally shifting my body to a new position (in my bed, as I’m being kept up with my running thoughts). Sometimes, it means moving away from your workspace, taking a walk, weeding in the garden, or laying out your yoga mat for some static poses (like child’s pose or a simple seated stretch, folding over your legs). There was a study done recently that shows the benefits of super slow running, and that 10 minutes of super slow running (ie, faster than walking with your body lightly bouncing, head bobbing) can offer tremendous benefits in how you feel and for your sense of confidence. This is why Hideaki Soya, professor emeritus at the University of Tsukuba, Japan, who oversaw the study, suggests using this method right before a stressful meeting or presentation, as it can relieve the feelings of worry or anxiety and put you in a space that is open and grounded.
3. Surround Yourself With Beauty
If you’ve ever studied Fung Shui or even read about the importance of reducing clutter, you know that our minds are easily affected by our environments. This is also why getting out into nature helps to reset our nervous system and calm us down so effectively. Consider adding some plants to your living space, fresh flowers, and/or photos of nature. You might also have beautiful words or poems you can put on display to uplift your space, or sensory items like candles or diffusers to cleanse and uplift the atmosphere. Music is also something that is really important to me, and I prioritize listening to songs that are positive and grounding. As I have been thinking about this topic of worry, my go- to song has been “Still Waters” by Leanna Crawford (2024), and I find myself singing the lyrics throughout the day. Songs like these can speak to our hearts in a way that is deeply moving and affirming.
4. Know You are Loved
Know in your bones that you are loved– passionately, unconditionally, uniquely, and for all time– by a loving creator who knew you even before your parents did. This is actually the most foundational practice that underlies the effectiveness of the others I mentioned above, because it relates to the root and essence of who you are and why you are here. To “know it” and to “feel it,” and even sometimes to “believe it,” is an evolutionary process in coming to really know ourselves well. But as Mother Han reminds us in the opening quote, to know we are loved by our creator, whom she calls our “Heavenly Parent,” can ultimately move us forward, away from the worry, fear, and anxiety we can’t help but feel daily, and towards the peace and happiness we are so desperately seeking.
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